Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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