my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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