I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
