I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
