Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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