And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
