you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
