this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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