Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
