i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
