Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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