I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
