i barfeds in our rink
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
