ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
