I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
