like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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