My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
