you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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