I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
