office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
