my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
we're chasing vodka with high fives
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
