Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
