My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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