I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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