i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
