party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
