She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
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