Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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