peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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