I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize