I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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