well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
