can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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