what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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