so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize