Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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