we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
