Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
