school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize