How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
