Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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