wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
