im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
