Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
