I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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