Heybabeimwearingurpanties
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
