I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
