i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
