I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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