she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
don't judge my taste in strippers
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
