Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
