Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
